- House: "Don't you have your own surgery?"
- Masters: "I took a break. I told them I had to pee."
- House: "You lied. It's a small one, but it's a gateway lie."
- — Last Temptation
Last Temptation is 7th season episode of House that first aired on April 18, 2011. It is the nineteenth episode of the season. It is directed by Tim Southam. Martha M. Masters has finally reached her goal of completing medical school, but now she is faced with an unexpected choice. House has posted an opening on his team for an intern, but all the candidates realize that House doesn't want an intern, he wants Masters. Instead of continuing on her original path to be a surgeon, Masters decides to accept the unique opportunity to be on House's team. Her first case is a 16 year old girl who gets sick just before she plans to leave on a solo circumnavigation of the world. In the patient, Masters sees another person who excelled at a very young age, and Masters starts to look to the patient for career advice. The patient's parents see the illness as only a small blip on their daughter's plans and keep acting as if her increasingly severe illness is only a minor hurdle to their daughter's ambitious goals. This leads to a bold move on Masters' part when she makes a decision that not even House sees coming regarding their patient's treatment. Meanwhile, Thirteen gets her license back, but to cover for her, House says she‘s been in rehab. House and Wilson have a bet to see who will be the first to "chicken out".
As Thirteen returns, Masters is ready to proceed with her career and is presented with a choice - return to the more or less normal life of a physician in training, or attempt to live full time in House's world of being "extraordinary". This is not the first time someone has had this choice - Foreman decided to return the craziness out of desperation, and Chase has already decided that House's world is where he wants to be. Later in the series, we show how both of them find their own way to excellence without becoming a carbon copy of their boss.
However, Masters finds the way harder going, being dragged in both directions at once. Again, we see how both Foreman and Chase resolved this conflict - Foreman quickly and Chase more slowly. Masters, by contrast, is literally on the fast track - impressing both the more traditional Dr. Simpson in the OR and the rebel House all within the same day. However, she quickly learns she can't live in both worlds. For all her talent, Simpson is not flexible enough to allow Masters to chart her own course. For all her promise, House is not patient enough for her to get comfortable in the course she will have to choose for herself.
Masters' dilemma is faced by many people who, in the past, have excelled at everything they have tried. Like everyone who has always been at the top, Masters has finally put herself into a situation where she is truly challenged. In addition, like every idealist, Masters is now torn by a real world situation where there is no clearly right answer. In the end, Masters has to make a choice not about what kind of doctor she wants to be, but what kind of a person she wants to be.
RecapEditMasters wakes up to her alarm and immediately starts reciting medical facts as she prepares to go to work. She’s still at it while eating Colo's Colios cereal when her roommate comes in and tells her she can relax - she’s not in first year any more. Masters tells her that she’s preparing for House, not school. Her roommate reminds her that this is her last day with House. However, Masters still has to do one more lumbar puncture to meet her practical requirement.
She arrives at an emergency room in chaos. She finds a patient who needs an LP, but finds another student doing it instead. She begs him to let him do it. However, her roommate comes by and tells them that House has just posted an opening for an intern. They all realize that House wants Masters to join the team.
Masters comes to House’s office and meets Thirteen. Chase and Taub come in too and give Thirteen a hug. Foreman just wants to know what happened to her. House lies and says she’s been in rehab. House tells them about the patient, who is a teenage girl planning on being the youngest person to sail around the world. She collapsed during a practice run. Her sponsors want her to be medically cleared, but if she doesn’t leave in three days, she won’t be the youngest person to accomplish the feat. Masters confirms this is her last day as a student. She thinks it’s just dehydration, but her pulse and blood pressure were fine when she was rescued. House asks about her internship, but Masters dodges the issue. Masters thinks the patient might have had a seizure, but Thirteen points out there’s no sign of head trauma. Taub notices that she was leaning on her back, which may have caused adrenal gland insufficiency. House orders the team to track her cortisol. Foreman realizes that House wants Masters to intern with him. However, Masters says she needs to do one more LP before she can even make up her mind. She wants to go to the ER to do it. House tells Thirteen to take Masters to do the blood draws instead.
The patient’s parents are quizzing her on seamanship. When they have to leave the room, Masters agrees to take over. Masters tells the patient she hasn’t been on a boat since she was a 13 year old freshman in college. The patient thinks she’s cool. The patient wants to speed up the testing. Thirteen says it’s not possible, but Masters suggests giving her a stress test - it will only take half-an-hour. Masters leaves to do her LP.
On the way, Masters runs into Cuddy. Cuddy’s busy and wants to put off speaking to Masters, but Masters tells her she’s got to decide today where she will intern. Cuddy points out how tough a boss House will be and tells her she will have to make up her own mind.
Masters arrives in the ER, only to find Cruz doing the LP. Masters realizes she has to find House. However, when she gets to his office, she sees a sign directing her to the ER and a live chicken. She finds House arguing with Thirteen about the cover story, but he counters he got her medical license back. Masters tells him about the chicken, and House denies there’s one there. Masters realizes House was lying about Thirteen’s rehab, but promises not to tell. She also sees House has just completed an LP. He asks her if she wants the intern job. She finally agrees. He completes her practical experience log book with the last LP and tells her to turn it in, and then she can have the job. Her pager goes off and House tells her to attend to it.
The patient’s hands turned blue during the stress test. They started her on vasodilators in time to restore full circulation. They find House making chicken footprints leading to Wilson’s office. House tells them that Wilson has a very calm and quiet breed of chicken. They finally decide it has to be a cerebral vasospasm and House orders calcium channel blockers. House sees that Masters still hasn’t turned in her log book. She says she’s been too busy. House tells her she’s not busy now.
Masters goes to Dr. Foley’s office to turn in her log book, but just stands outside the door. She finally turns away and runs into her roommate. The roommate tells her to take the internship because of her tendency to rub people the wrong way, her habit of arguing everything, and her peculiar fashion sense - none of that will matter to House. Everyone else thinks she’s weird. They see Wilson chasing a chicken.
Masters asks about the chickens and Thirteen tells her that House and Wilson have a bet to see how long they can go without getting caught. They were going to use pigs, but couldn’t find two of them. Foreman encourages Masters to stick around - she remembers what the rules are and stands up for them. Masters counters that if she doesn’t play House’s way, she won’t let him in. Foreman encourages her to work around House’s rules, but she would still have to lie to him. Thirteen takes Masters to do her last LP.
It’s Thirteen that needs the LP. She tells Masters about her Huntington's disease. She tells Masters she doesn’t want anyone to know why she was gone. She can’t just tell them to respect her privacy, because none of the rest of the team respects privacy. Masters asks if there’s room for someone on the team with a different perspective, and Thirteen tells her no unless House decides he needs someone like that.
During the procedure, Foreman managed to get a picture of the pineal gland and found it had calcified. The patient just needs hormone replacement therapy. Masters tells House she handed in her log, and House asks she did an LP on Thirteen. Masters admits it, and House says the whole point was not to break his rules, but the hospital’s rules. Masters wants to know why it’s so bad not to want to cheat. House withdraws his internship and tells her to enjoy being a surgeon.
Masters wakes up the next morning and starts quizzing herself about surgical matters. She gets her new identification. Dr. Simpson welcomes Masters and the other interns to the surgical department.
Masters is observing surgery and makes a suggestion. Simpson agrees with it and compliments Masters. However, after the surgery, Simpson asks Masters why she spoke out when interns are only supposed to ask questions. Masters realizes that House’s patient is up for surgery but Simpson doesn’t know anything about the case. He asks Masters to scrub for a lung harvest. Instead, she goes to observe the operation on House’s patient. She sees the patient’s father, who tells her that the patient collapsed in the parking lot and they’re now doing a sympathectomy. She should be ready for her trip in 36 hours. The patient’s father says they are just trying to help her with her dream. Masters gets paged to her operation.
Masters assists with the lung harvest. She says she has to leave to use the washroom, and someone takes over for her. Instead she goes to House’s patient, who is having severe difficulties. House realizes she had to lie at least three times. They start a differential. Masters thinks it’s acidosis, but House goes with Thirteen’s suggestion of granulomatosis with polyangiitis. House welcomes Masters back to the team, but Masters says she’s only back for the case. House compliments her on her lying.
Masters goes back to Simpson to say that she’s doing a consult for House. Simpson allows her to transfer out, but tells her not to stay out too long because he’s already on his way to forgetting who she is, then Masters runs into her roommate and Cruz in the locker room and tells them she’s staying late to help with House’s case.Masters in the lab running tests. She goes back to House’s office to hit the books and finds the chicken in a covered cage, but it’s making noises. She lies down on the floor to think when Wilson comes in and heads towards House’s chicken. Wilson sees Masters and waves half-heartedly. He uncovers the cage and finds a chicken doll and a recording. He realizes he’s been locked into House’s office and House is making a limping dash towards Wilson’s office. Wilson heads for the balcony. Suddenly, Masters realizes something.
Masters goes to see the patient and asks if poultry ever made her sick. She admits she had some pheasant in a can that made her sick. Masters thinks she has salmonella and starts examining her to see if she has any tenderness in her bones. She asks the patient if she always like sailing. The patient says she only started when she was ten. She says she loves it, but there are things about it she hates. However, she says if there weren’t things to overcome, it wouldn’t be worth doing. Masters finds a tender spot just above her left elbow.
Masters and Chase do an MRI to confirm. Chase asks her if she’s headed back to surgery. When Masters expresses some hesitation, Chase tells her she should go back to surgery. Chase says being with House changed him, and perhaps not for the better. He doesn‘t think its possible to go back once you change. They find something in the humerus, but it looks like cancer.
Masters tells the patient she has lymphosarcoma. Her arm will have to be amputated. The patient still wants to try to break the record. Her parents are incredulous. She says that the previous night they thought it was just an infection, but Masters confirms it is cancer. Delaying the amputation will mean the cancer will most likely spread. She still wants to go on the sail because she feels fine and it will only take a month. Masters confirms that waiting that long will risk her life. The parents ask for time to discuss it, but Masters is incredulous they are even considering letting her go. She leaves the room stunned.
The father comes out and tells Masters that the patient insists on sailing. Master tells them that the patient is a minor and if the parents consent, they can do the amputation. However, the mother won’t consent. Masters tells her that only one parent has to consent, but the father tell her that if he does that, the patient will go to court to become an emancipated minor and will probably win. The father just wants to keep the family together.
Masters finds House training a dog to chase feathers. He tells her the case is over and she can go back to surgery. However, she still wants to convince the patient to have the amputation. House tells her it’s the patient’s decision to risk her life. He says he just wanted a diagnosis and that if Masters wants to save the patient’s life, she has to break the rules. When she says she can’t, he tells her she’s not exceptional.
Masters goes to see Wilson to ask advice. He tells her to keep trying to convince the patient because it’s all she can do. Wilson tells her House was in the same boat, refusing life saving surgery in favor of a risky procedure. It was his girlfriend who signed the consent form while House was unconscious who probably saved his life.
Suddenly the dog comes in and grabs Wilson’s chicken. However, in the confusion, House’s chicken gets out of Wilson’s office and a security guard sees it. Wilson tells the guard that it’s House’s chicken and wins the bet with House.
Masters goes home to work on paper airplanes. She goes back to the hospital and keeps trying to convince the patient to have the amputation. The patient tells Masters that it’s not about the record. She got so good at sailing, she was beating all comers because she saw things others couldn’t. She wants to do it to show herself she’s the best at what she does. Masters goes to give her medication and warns her it’s going to burn a bit.
Masters goes to House’s office, hears her pager go off, and rushes to the patient’s room. She finds the rest of the team treating the patient for a cardiac blockage that is causing bradycardia. They think it’s a paraneoplastic syndrome. They rush the patient to surgery as Masters explains to the parents that this is the side effect of the cancer she was worried about. She asks them to sign the consent for the amputation and the parents agree.
Masters goes to the surgery suite and tells the team to push calcium chloride. She admits she caused the bradycardia and shows them the consent to remove the arm.
The patient wakes up. Masters tells her about the cardiac episode, and the patient finds that her left arm is missing. Masters tells her that they had already found cancer in her lymph nodes and they had no choice. The patient tells her parents she hates them. The parents say that’s okay and embrace her. The mother thanks Masters.
Masters goes home and wakes up the next morning, this time not practicing her medical knowledge. House find her despondent in his office. She tells him she’s done things no doctor in their right mind would do, but House congratulates her. House reminds her she was right, and Masters wonders why she’s not feeling good or satisfied. He tells her You can't always get what you want. House pays Wilson his $20 and finds out that Wilson’s chicken survived the dog, at least physically. They decide to use ferrets next. Masters tells him she’s leaving the team for good because she can’t do it any more. He tells her nothing will ever be simple again, and she say’s she’s fine with that. As she leaves, she trips over House’s chicken, laughs for a second, and then heads off a little more cheerful.
- Masters graduates medical school.
- Masters is hired as House’s new intern, then is fired, then comes back, then leaves again.
- Masters falsifies a heart blockage in order to convince the patient’s parents to consent to an amputation.
- House and Wilson have a bet on who can keep a chicken in the hospital the longest without being detected. Wilson wins.
Zebra Factor 4/10Edit
Lymphosarcoma is one of the most common forms of cancer.
The title is a reference to The Last Temptation of Christ, a 1955 novel first published in Greek that was later made into a film. The book portrays a Christ who, although free of sin, still has human failings, including the desire to keep on living. This mirrors the moral dilemmas that Masters has to face to solve the case.
Trivia and Cultural ReferencesEdit
- Masters’ mnemonic for cranial nerves is “On Old Olympus’s Towering Tops, A Friendly Viking Grows Vines and Hops”.
- "Couric" is television journalist Katie Couric.
- The Einstein Museum was originally a temporary exibit of the Bern Historical Museum, but due to its popularity, was kept as a permanent exhibit.
- House's mention of "magical gum" is a reference to Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Turning blue from magical gum is the fate of the character Violet Beauregarde.
- Cruz’s threat to “skin you and wear you as a disguise” is another reference to The Silence of the Lambs, which itself was loosely based on Ed Gein, a notorious murderer and body snatcher from Wisconsin.
- "Float the swan" is medical slang to insert a particular type of cardiac catheter, the Swan-Ganz, and to let it naturally fall into place.
- "You had me at "I had to pee"" is a reference to the movie Jerry Maguire.
- Extra Crispy or Original Recipe is a reference to KFC.
- House at one point tells Masters that the Second Amendment is the part of the Constitution which says people have the right to be stupid.
- Masters' final scene is at first deliberately shot and scored very similarly to Allison Cameron's departure in the previous season, before the moment is subverted by her tripping over House's chicken.
- Masters is shown to have a roommate, despite saying she lived alone in Small Sacrifices.
- As Masters is examining Kendall's arms, the arm she is checking momentarily switches when the camera pans out.
- Hugh Laurie briefly lapses back into his British accent when he's petting the dog.
- Masters' medical education is certainly on the fast track. Although interns generally all start on the same day (July 1 of each year), they generally graduate a couple of months earlier so they can have a graduation ceremony and a much needed break. In addition, no intern would be shopping for an internship the day before they start - almost all interns sign a binding internship agreement on March 1 after going through a matching process with several hospitals. That same agreement would also make it impossible for even a department head to fire an intern - because internship is a mandatory part of medical licensing, firing an intern requires a hearing before a disciplinary panel and it usually only considered if an intern has underperformed for some period of time, or has committed a serious disciplinary offense.
- Wilson's chicken probably isn't an Australorp. Although Australian authorities recognize a white variety of the breed, in the United States they have to have black feathers.
Medical Errors Edit
- Calcified pineal glands are very common in adolescents (about 10%) and aren't clinically significant. Polite Dissent thought they probably meant a calcified pituitary gland, which would be clinically significant and would fit the symptoms.
- Polite Dissent had never heard of a "lymphoid sarcoma" and thought they might mean a lymphosarcoma. However, he thought the symptoms better fit an osteosarcoma.
- Polite Dissent also couldn't figure out how any bone tumor could cause Kendall to suddenly lose consciousness. It didn't fit well with the other symptoms, such as the vasoconstriction.
- Although a history of head trauma can lead to seizures, most patients who suffer a seizure have never had a head injury.
- Hypertensive crisis is a poor fit for a patient who has recently presented with normal blood pressure and heart rate.
- Doctors rarely prescribe "hormones" or "immune suppressants" for a condition. They specify a hormone or immune suppressant instead.
- Salmonella would be very unlikely to cause a bone infection in an otherwise healthy individual with a functioning immune system.
- Cruz is shown performing a lumbar puncture without supervision. Whether he's done one or eleven, he must do each one while a licensed physician is looking on to comply with legal requirements for the practice of medicine by medical students and interns.
Medical Ethics Edit
The right to refuse treatment has often been front and center on the series since the Pilot. However, this episode presents us with a unique hypothetical case where even a well-informed and advised physician would find themselves in great difficulty about what to do.
The rules, of course, are very clear in this case:
- Patients who are conscious and have full mental capacity have a right to refuse any treatment, no matter how non-invasive or how likely it is to be successful.
- Minors, even those who have full mental capacity, can express their wishes on the course of their treatment, but the physicians are bound to accept the decisions of the minor patient's parents as their final medical proxy.
Masters clearly does get one thing wrong. While in an emergency one parent can sign the necessary consent forms against their child's wishes, when both parents are present, consent cannot proceed except with the consent of both parents. This was the exact situation we were presented with in Finding Judas where the parents kept disagreeing about the course of treatment so often that Cuddy was eventually made the child's medical proxy. In other words, it doesn't matter if the father alone had consented - the wishes of the mother and patient probably would have trumped the father's wishes.
As an oncologist, Wilson has probably faced this problem (and, in fact, he would again in Transplant). It's becoming an increasing problem in oncology where the standard treatments have severe side effects, and many patients opt for alternative medicine. While that's not an exact parallel with the situation here, many of the same issues arise - a delay in treatment is likely to be fatal when a standard course of treatment is likely to be successful.
In addition, it is probably improper for a physician to bypass the wishes of a minor patient who has normal mental capacity, even if the parents wish it. In Kids, House faces a similar dilemma where his patient, a 12 year-old, has been diagnosed but does not want her parents to know the cause of her illness. There was a similar situation in Skin Deep, where after properly reporting that the minor patient had had sex with her father, the patient denied it and refused to co-operate with any investigation. Even in a simple case involving a clinic patient in Sleeping Dogs Lie, a 16 year-old who wants contraception without her parents knowing, its clear that minors do have rights at law.
As such, Masters' creative solution is clearly one that would get her into trouble if anyone found out. Despite the good outcome, she would probably face discipline.
Reviews of the episode were decidedly mixed. There was no clear consensus about any part of the episode either about the plot or the performance of the actors. Although some critics drew parallels with other episodes that didn't focus on House (such as 5 to 9 and Wilson), others thought that the episode wasn't entirely focused on Masters. There was even disagreement on whether more time should have been spent on Thirteen's return to the hospital or whether the sudden reinstatement of her license took away the opportunity to further develop her character or establish a new story-arc.
- TV.com users rated the episode an 8.2.They chose Amber Tamblyn as their Most Valuable Performer
- IMDB users rated the episode 8.6 with 31% of users giving it a "10" rating. It did best with females 18-29 (8.8) and worst with males under 18 (6.9).
- The Onion AV Club rated the episode a B-
- Polite Dissent was not impressed. He gave the mystery a C- with the final solution and the medicine a being given a D. However, he liked the plot and gave it an A.
- Hugh Laurie as Gregory House
- Lisa Edelstein as Lisa Cuddy
- Omar Epps as Eric Foreman
- Robert Sean Leonard as James Wilson
- Jesse Spencer as Robert Chase
- Peter Jacobson as Chris Taub
- Olivia Wilde as Remy Hadley
- Amber Tamblyn as Martha M. Masters
- Jennifer Landon as Donovan
- Michelle DeFraites as Kendall Pearson
- Ron Perkins as Dr. Ron Simpson
- Gerald McCullouch as Bobby Pearson
- Tommy Savas as Cruz
- Bridgett Newton as Paige Pearson
- Tony Edwards as Roscoe
- Will Deutsch as Dr. Pressman
- Helena Apothaker as Nurse Ellen Hoffner
- Bobbin Bergstrom as Nurse
- Mashari Leila Bain as Doctor
- Jay Perry as Surgical Intern One
- Annie Ruby as Surgical Intern Two
Dr. Robert Chase: Once this case is over, you going back to surgery?
Martha Masters: That's the plan.
Dr. Robert Chase: I think that's a mistake. I think you should go back to surgery.
Martha Masters: I just said I was.
Dr. Robert Chase: No. You said it was your plan. Which means House might be right. You might be lying to yourself.
Martha Masters: Would it be so terrible? You chose House over surgery.
Dr. Robert Chase: My time here has changed me. In ways not everyone in my life thought was for the better.
Dr. Gregory House: Bird recover okay?
Dr. James Wilson: Physically - yes. Emotionally - it was a long night. Next week - ferrets?
Martha Masters: House, I can't do it. I'm leaving.
Dr. Gregory House: Surgery?
Martha Masters: ...I - don't know what I'm going to do. But I do know I don't want to be here.
Dr. Gregory House: ...Nothing will ever be the same again.
Martha Masters: Fine.
Dr. Remy 'Thirteen' Hadley: You did this?
Martha Masters: Parents signed the consent form. Amputate her arm.
Martha Masters: I did things no doctor in their right minds would do.'
Dr. Gregory House: Good.
Martha Masters: I manipulated, lied, forged, stole.
Dr. Gregory House: I don't want to know the specifics. I'd be called to testify.
Martha Masters: I broke the rules because I believed I was right.
Dr. Gregory House: You were.
Martha Masters: Then why don't I feel good or satisified? Instead I just feel like throwing up.
Dr. Gregory House: And you're following me to ask how I break the rules and maintain my rosy demeanor?
Martha Masters: I didn't do it to be happy. I-I just thought I would be.
Dr. Gregory House: You can't always get what you want.
Dr. Gregory House: So coloring inside the lines is more important than saving this girl's life? I was wrong about one thing - you are not exceptional.
Kendall Pearson: It has nothing to do with anybody - except me. The other racers would think I was crazy. I'd set off on some tacking angle that made no sense to them because they couldn't see what I saw. I could sense the changes in the wind - before they happened... Top of the game - you play by different rules.
Martha Masters: You want me to be like you. It's not gonna happen.
Dr. Gregory House: It's the last thing I want. Because then neither one of us would be exceptional.
Dr. Robert Chase: I think when you do change, it's not so simple to go back.
Martha Masters: No one will stop Kendell sailing. You need to step in.
Dr. Gregory House: Sign on the door says I'm a Diagnostician. Cool diagnosis says I'm finished.
Martha Masters: She could die.
House: Pretty sure the law of the land states that everyone has the right to be an idiot. I think it's the Second Amendment.
Martha Masters: Did you always know that sailing was 'it' for you? That it was the right thing?
Kendall Pearson: I didn't even start till I was 10 & at first I was not a fan. Certainly there's plenty not to like about sailing.
Martha Masters: But now that you're so into it...
Kendall Pearson: Oh, no. There's still plenty of things I hate about it. I hate being wet. I hate being cold. I hate eating nothing but freeze dried food.
Martha Masters: That was quite the endorsement.
Kendall Pearson: Sailing is amazing, but it doesn't mean I love every second on the boat. Doing what you love means dealing with things you don't. If there were nothing to overcome it might not be that... ow!
Martha Masters: It's kind of like coming to an end of an extreme roller coaster. Even with the terror, naseau, and whiplash. I'm a little sad that it's over.
Martha Masters: House has opened up an internship.
Dr. Lisa Cuddy: You do realize if you take it. He'll probably end up firing you again.
Martha Masters: He's always hired me back.
Dr. Lisa Cuddy: And he'll continue mocking and insulting you- whatever chance you get.
Martha Masters: It's certainly toughened me up. You're trying to get me to say good things about him.
Dr. Lisa Cuddy: No, I'm trying to make you make your own decision and leave me alone. Working with House is great - and it sucks - often simultaneously. Most people can't work in that environment. Question is: can you?
Donovan: Point is: you rub people the wrong way. But House is okay with your lack of bedside manner. He's okay with your willingness to argue any point with anyone - even if they outrank you. He's okay with your peculiar fashion sense.
Martha Masters: It's peculiar?
Donovan: House doesn't think you're weird - which is weird. But good weird.
Dr. Robert Chase: What's with the sudden interest in her future?
Dr. Gregory House: You know, a blacksmith who spends this much time hammering out a new blade from raw Jell-O, he gets curious about who ends up wielding it.
Dr. Eric Foreman: No reason to be curious unless you're interested in wielding it yourself. You want her to intern here.'
Martha Masters: You did an LP? Why didn't you page me?
Dr. Gregory House: Oh, I'm sorry. Did you want to do one of those? You should've spoken up. You want the job or not?
Martha Masters: Um... I... After careful consideration, I have decided to accept your offer for an internship.
Dr. Gregory House: Great. My department has a slightly different procedure log.
Martha Masters: Uh, you forged the last one. I only did 9 LPs.
Dr. Gregory House: Do you know how to do an LP?
Martha Masters: Of course.
Dr. Gregory House: Do you know how to do 9 LPs and say it was 10? It's time to grow up. Turn that in, the job is yours.
Martha Masters: Can someone please explain to me what House and Wilson are doing with those chickens?
Dr. Remy 'Thirteen' Hadley: They have a bet to see who can keep a chicken in the hospital the longest without getting busted by security. Advancing past the vertebral artery.
Martha Masters: And why are they doing this?
Dr. Eric Foreman: The place they bought them only had one pig.
Masters: You don't have to face House every day.
Donovan: And after today neither do you. Here's to no more coming home in tears.
Donovan: There's an opening in the Diagnosic's Department.
Cruz: House wants an intern?
Masters: He never has before.
Donovan: You got to figure he doesn't want an intern, he wants you.
Dr. Foreman: I'm glad you're gonna be sticking around after today.
Masters: Really? You want me to stay?
Dr. Foreman: It's good to add a different perspective to the department. Someone who still remembers there are rules other than House's.
Masters: If I don't play by House's rules, he won't let me in.
Dr. Foreman: Find a way around them.
Masters: I'd have to lie to him, which is still lying.
Thirteen: Lying about a lie, that's practically telling the truth.
Thirteen: Thank you, House, for respecting my privacy. What a perfect reminder that I'm back.
Dr. Foreman: I didn't even know you had a problem.
House: Loved ones are always the last to know. Loved ones and robotic, estranged ex-boyfriends.
House: Masters, there's no hurry. There's no wrong choices. At least, that's what they tell people who make crappy choices.
Masters: Why are you lying about rehab?
Thirteen: Because the real reason I was gone is not something I want to share.
Masters: Couldn't you just say that? Should be enough for Foreman and the others.
Thirteen: How long have you worked here? House's people have personalities that range from nosy to "pardon me while I do this cavity search."
Masters: Do you think there's room for someone who does things differently?
Thirteen: Not unless House decides that's what he wants.
Donovan: You're back with House.
Masters: Mm. Just this one case. I'm not staying.
Cruz: I would kill for a chance to work with him. Like, literally skin you and wear you as a disguise.
Masters: Isn't that House's chicken?
Dr. Wilson: Disgusting beasts. I don't know why I ever agreed to this bet.
Masters: So call it off.
Dr. Wilson: And lose $20?
Release Dates Edit
- United States - April 18, 2011 on Fox
- Canada - April 18, 2011 on Global
- United Kingdom - April 28, 2011 on Sky1
- Finland - May 17, 2011
- Australia - May 30, 2011
- Netherlands - September 29, 2011
- Hungary - October 5, 2011
- Germany - November 15, 2011 on RTL
- Poland - January 12, 2012 on TVP2
- Finland - February 14, 2012 on TV4
- Czech Republic - February 20, 2012 on TV Nova
- Slovakia - July 26, 2012 on STV1
- Japan - April 30, 2013
- Finland - June 24, 2013 on MTV3
- You can't always get what you want by The Rolling Stones - plays as Masters walks down the hallway at the end of the episode.
In Other Languages Edit
- France and Quebec - Enfreindre les règles (Eng. "Break the rules")
- Episode article at Wikipedia
- Episode page at IMDB
- Episode review at the Onion AV Club
- A review of the medicine at Polite Dissent
- Episode review at Blogcritics
- Episode transcript at Clinic Duty
- A list of the music tracks at Tunefind
- Episode page at House MD Guide
- Episode review at IGN
- Episode page at TV.com
- Episode page at Ace Showbiz
- Episode transcript at Springfield Springfield
- A list of the music tracks at Whatsong
- Episode review at TV Fanatic
- Episode review at Monsters of Television
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